Groan Zone
Monday 12 November 2012
Beautiful
Me as a
baby
This is a picture of me
as a baby - ugly - I think you will agree. However, when I grew into
an adult, like the story of the duckling I developed into the
proverbial swan. Graceful, good looking and with a serene grace that
was a pleasure to behold for all.
Such attractiveness is
not without it's problems. Having to avoid the amorous advances of
both men and women became an art – pretending to be indifferent and
even aggressive to others became a necessary façade to avoid the
overload and attention of determined admirers. I made a lot of money
re-cycling the mountains paper from fan letters and Bil-let-doux's
There were moments
where my defences were down though and such an occasion arose when a
lady (I will call her Winnie on account of the fact she may never
have made it over Beachers Brook) invited me to dinner at her place
and laid out on the table was an array of sheer negligence in
underwear and night attire that I was to choose for the desert. I
made a pretty fast gallop home I can tell you.
Another occasion was a
rather lovely young lady who having achieved a date requested that in
stead of Y-Fronts I should wear the special O-Fronts that she had
designed. This was in order for her to see me in my underwear without
concealing some of my prominent (at the time) most desirable
features. Uncomfortably exciting.
It is now that time of
year when I take a shower which makes me feel good as well as fresh
for a gambol. After drying my svelte and sinuous torso I cavort about
naked just to tease and delight my significant other. I realise this
is the cruel side of my nature as she finds me so utterly
irresistible it is embarrassing. I am always amazed at the fortitude
and ingenuity of her resistance to my glory as she rushes off making
a guffawing noise.
Of course I appreciate
all this is in the eye of the beholder. But am I not a wonder to
behold? Such magnetic sexual attraction should not be let out in
public.
Next time we meet just
look at me through half closed eyes and you will see what I mean.
Hello and welcome to my pages of nonsense.
Pages of meaningless rubbish and odd bits from my brain that I jot down here. You may groan at some of my one liners and think some are profound but what the hell - just waste some time. Let me know
what you think - comments at the foot of each page.
Or email anthonydickins@gmail.com
Idea for a name
Prince Charles, in his garden at Highgrove has an area called "The Stumpary" - an area with old tree stumps which are allowed to rot natrually and grow wild for insects and grubs to make their home.
Some people have wormeries in their garden to allow the worms to process vegetable matter into compost.
I am planning an area for bugs to help with the insect population and I invite your ideas for a name....
________________________________
I have been really busy today looking out the window...
...and if I get bored I look out of another window.
There was a hole in my memory but I couldn’t look into it because I’d forgotten where it was.
It’s just as well fish can swim.
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